A Relaunching and A Peek into Dongbei Drinking Culture

I wrote a post a while back and never posted it! Sorry, all. I've just decided that we're going to aim for at least one post a week. Many apologies that the site has been neglected - we've been very busy (well, I work every day on top of going to class, but Tom doesn't, so you'll have to ask him for his excuse). I get online once a week, so expect a post about every weekend.

The last post was about getting my hair cut (always an adventure; the guy gave me a very bad bob and was so nervous it took him an hour and a half!) and buying coats and warm shoes. So don't worry, everybody, we have warm coats. (Mine, a knee length goose down coat, cost $13!)

Yesterday was a strange moment for me. I was outside with my coat on but unzipped, and I was sweating. I thought, "Wow, the weather is really nice today! It's warmed up!" Then, I noticed the ice around our building wasn't melted... and when I got the weather report, I discovered the temperature was a high of 20F. Hah!

Anyway, things have been good recently. I've been very busy with work, and today is my day off! The school wants me to teach preschoolers at 9am on Saturdays, but I flat out refused (I even told them that I needed one day off a week, which is so spoiled and excessive here - but I don't care! Ha!). So today Tom gets a taste of working while I lounge around the house - but there is a lot of work to be done around here, so I don't think I'm actually going to be doing much lounging anyway.

Aside from work, we're busy with class and fun things, too. We've been hanging out with the Americans about once a week and our class has been spending more time together too. I hear tonight we're going bowling again, hurray! Thanksgiving was a little sad here, but not much. We went out with the Russians for dumplings, which was good. Later we heard that the Americans went out for a big American meal, but we missed that memo. Oh well. We did make a trip to Metro, the big German warehouse/grocery store that is full of imported stuff and bought some cheese (Irish cheddar and camembert!) and wine.

My adult students, whom I love, took me out to dinner last weekend. It was a lot of fun and my first experience of a meal out with a bunch of Chinese people. Let me tell you, it's exhausting - and not just because we speak exclusively in Chinese. Here's how it goes: everybody orders way more food than they could possibly eat, and a (big) bottle of beer for each person. At your place you have a saucer-sized plate, chopsticks, a spoon, a teacup, and a small glass.

The food is placed in the middle of the table on a lazy susan, which people turn as they want to eat dishes on the other side of the table. You eat out of the main dishes with your own spoon and chopsticks - I hear there was a movement to use "common use chopsticks," a set placed in each dish, but it's such a pain that practically nobody does. Also, it's a big no-no to dig around with your own chopsticks in a dish - that combined with the fact that people are extremely proficient with using them that hygiene is not too big of an issue.

At the start, everybody is poured a glass of beer - and everybody drinks it. (In fact, the Chinese word for "cheers" means "dry your glass" - and it's not a figure of speech.) Another glass is poured. You don't leisurely sip your beer. As everybody eats, picking from each plate, people "jing jiu" - I'm not sure how this is normally translated but it basically means you each chug a glass of beer. This, along with the rowdy (and increasingly so) conversation, functions as the entertainment of the night. More beer is inevitably ordered.

I hear that forcing people to drink is a common thing here - yes, bad, but maybe not as bad as it sounds. If you really can't drink, people won't make you, and it's not a frat party where they'll make you drink until you pass out - or die. That said, lines like "bu zui bu gui" ("if you're not drunk, you can't go home") are common. Refusing to drink when somebody "jing"s you is like refusing their friendship. However, my students were very clear that you only drink what you want - which really means if someone "jing"s you, you can drink a sip instead of the whole glass.

The drinking culture is so important here, especially in the Northeast, that we studied it in our Chinese class! It's not all bad, though. For example, when you make a toast and clink glasses, it's respectful for the mouth of your glass to be below the mouth of the other person. Usually this is to show respect to older people and important people, but between friends it means that they wrestle glasses to the table and even sometimes to the ground to have the lowest cup. It's quite cute. (I heard from a Canadian that the first time he drank in China he gave a hearty "cheers" and threw his glass up high, like we do in the West... and really offended all the people he was drinking with. Oops.)

So there you have it, drinking culture in China in a nutshell. In the end, by the way, we only ended up drinking about a bottle or two per person and the only people who got drunk were the baby of the group, a 17 year old (because he was trying to get drunk - he kept saying "I can still drink!" and of course if you do that somebody is going to "jing" you), and the oldest woman, a 30 year old (because everybody wanted to drink with "big sister," her nickname - it's a respectful term of address for people a little older than you. I can call elementary school kids "little brother/sister" and they call me "big sister" back. But I digress). So, for everybody at home concerned about our safety (or livers), no worries.

After dinner, the class went to sing karaoke - actually cool here, and a legitimate weekend activity! I tried to explain that in America singing karaoke is embarrassing and people usually only do it spur-of-the-moment while drunk at a bar, but they said, "Don't you like to sing?" (Well, yeah.) "So when you want to sing, where do you go?" (Uh... I sing in my apartment.) "But nobody can hear you that way!" Haha. Maybe next time I'll go with them and give you a full report on what it's like.

Well, that's all for now. I promise we'll be better about posting from now on - promise! We miss you all and hope all is well wherever you are.